Tuesday, November 21, 2006
i know your'e out there.. somewhere out there.
there are days i want to be the guy in the mirror. and there are days when i dont want to bother anymore. whats the point of hoping? hope is the idea that there exists a better world, a better place, that things will get better. but they rarely do, you just have to make do with what is. idealism is for fools and immature kids. grow up dammit. GROW UP.
i wish it wasnt so.
or so it seems, at 12:02 AM
Thursday, November 09, 2006
Cheescake and Maggie Mee
Today's key phrase is smells like. Smells like teen spirit? That's such a cliche. But no, thats not what im going to be talking about today. What it really smells like is puke. Yup, cheesecake smells like puke. Especially after its been eaten, its like this stench lingers around your mouth and wafts up to your nose all the time. And you think 'wth?'. Yeah, the cheesecake went down pretty well, it was nice (thanks mom! my mom made oreo cheesecake see). But what is with this lingering smell! I was never a big fan of cheesecakes.. and this just puts me off more. I prefer my tiramisu thank you very much. Or a nice cold mudpie *yum* Really wets the palate.
Smells like boredom. What? You can't smell boredom! That's probably because you havent really experienced the worst of it. You don't know what boredom is until you've spent hours on end standing still doing nothing (i thank army for that). You don't know what boredom is until you've spent everyday sitting lifelessly infront of the computer stoning. You don't know what boredom is until you realise you have no discipline to get off your ass and do something with your life unless pushed. Boredom is when there's no push. No drive. No motivation. That's a life of boredom for you. And i'm you.
Smells like the sweet smell of rain. Well its not really 'sweet' per se, but it smells nice anyway. When it gets all breezy, and it smells fresher than usual. You know its going to rain. Smells much better than the haze anyway, guess its just as well that the monsoon has come. As long as it doesnt intefere with my soccer plans. Thats right. Stay away from 7-noon tomorrow, so i'll have a nice dry court to play on. Be sunny. Please come and shower us with your radiance, Mr Sun. Please come. I like rain and all.. but nothing beats a regular sunny day.
or so it seems, at 11:12 PM
Wednesday, November 08, 2006
Stop and Go Aishiteru.
Today's keyword is tired. Nuff' said.
or so it seems, at 12:17 AM
Tuesday, November 07, 2006
Mangoes from the future II.
For a cheap trill. No wonder they are the best, can't get anymore fresh than that! And to display the clarity of my Sony Cybershot, which i love.
P.S. They really do taste very nice.
or so it seems, at 12:44 AM
Monday, November 06, 2006
Mangoes from the future.
Today's keyword is irritating. The first thing i thought this morning when i woke up was 'fuckin' irritatin''. Yeah, im cranky when awoken unnaturally (a self-set alarm being the exception). My body seems to require a minimum of 9 hours of blissful sleep, i cant wake up without the aid of an alarm clock unless i clock that much sleep, regardless of when i sleep. Oh well. At least i'll be able to get that much sleep in the near future.. not sure when i'll start job hunting anyway. Speaking of job-hunting, food for thought.. general degrees seem to lose value over time, where there isnt really a field of expertise in which you specialise in and gain valuable experience over time. So unlike an accountancy or law degree, where practice adds value to your worth, a general degree just slowly erodes away, and by the time your'e 40 your'e in big shit unless you've been producing an outstanding record over the years. Maybe studying your interests and ignoring the fact that a more specialized degree could safeguard your future is a silly thing to do. Maybe.
Irritating!! What's irritating? Singaporean drivers. Was driving along Holland Road past Gleneagles Hospital on my way to town, and there was this guy with his left signal on. Forced me to horn at him. Why? He suddenly swerved into the right lane (which i was in) and made me jam my brakes (well not jam, i had noticed he was keeping really close to my lane, luckily), avoiding a collision. I understand that u want to turn left, and u perhaps saw an obstruction infront of you, forcing you to turn into my lane and back in again. But use your fucking eyes once in awhile. And change your bloody signal if u want to go RIGHT instead of LEFT.
Irritating!! What else is irritating? Smokers. Thats right, i hate smokers. Or well i dont really hate people who smoke, i just hate smoke. Like, what is so appealing about a small white round stick filled with all sorts of toxic and poisonous materials? Do you think you look cool? Do you think its fashionable? Or are you just a poor soul who got hooked after trying it a few times, and are now addicted to it? Whichever way it is, i hope you know that each time you breath in a puff, your'e undoubtably shortening your life. Or maybe your'e not, since its the smoke you breath out which is the more dangerous of the two, the smoke that floats all over Orchard Road, the smoke that plagues busstops, and basically any open aired space that can be found. The 'smoking kills' ad campaign is just amusement to you, seeing that cancerous throat and shrugging. 'that won't happen to me'. Well, maybe it will, maybe it wont. But someone else will. Not your fault? well its impossible to prove beyond a shadow of a doubt that smoking kills, but the odds are against you on that one. If people hate the haze so much, they should hate smoking all the more. And i really hate the haze.
Irritating!! What, there's more? Yes! Today is bitchfest. Inconsiderate people. This includes the two catergories listed above. Thats right. I really hope that people in general are incosiderate, because im glad to be a Singaporean, and it would be a shame if Singaporeans were more inconsiderate than other nationalities. But, please. Would it hurt to at least ATTEMPT to clean up the mess you leave behind? When u spill popcorn in the cinema, at least have the deceny to make it LOOK like you tried to clean up the mess, instead of ruining the seats for the next few movie goers who have the incredible luck of choosing those exact seats for their movie. Also, what is up with throwing tissue paper into urinals? What, the dustbin in the toilet is too far away? You thought that your tissue paper would be able to defy physics and fit through the filter in urinals? Or maybe you thought it would be funny if the urinal overflowed and filled the whole toilet with piss. And to those 'scouts' and 'talent spotters' who roam around Orchard MRT. I know its not an easy job, and the pay probably sucks, and you most likely need to comission. But how many times must a girl say 'no' before you back off? To the guy (im being nice and refraining from the mass number of vulgarities in my mind now) who followed us (aimee and me) all along wisma to taka and couldn't take the hint, like wtf? Maybe you think after 'no', 'no', and 'not interested' you still can work your charm? Does the rapidly walking away and lack of eye contact not mean anything to you? Maybe a 'get out of my face you fucking idiot' would be a stronger hint. And that's being nice.
haha shit what a pointless rant. Like things will ever change. Patience is a virtue which i lack when it comes to situations like these. But, it really really really is, damn fucking irritating sometimes.
or so it seems, at 11:54 PM
Lizard in the kitchen sink.Today's keyword is choice. It happens that another chapter of our short lives (yes 20 is short) has drawn to a close with the 3 magical letters O R D. Everyone goes on about how we''l now be free, no longer under the tyrannical control of the SAF, able to do things as we like when we like. Freedom. Which brings me to todays keyword: choice. How much choice do we really have? I feel like we have too much choice, rather. One good thing about being in the army is that you don't have to make decisions, decisions are made for you. In the big picture everything that has occured in the last 22 months has been rather inconsequential, with little to no impact on our future lives. Sure there might have been a certain amount of 大开眼界, where we thus far sheltered beings have been exposed to the realties of working life and its people. Thats pretty much about it, i rather doubt the effect we've had on the safeguarding of our country. But thats not the point. The point is that now that we find ourselves free once more, free for 10 months infact, theres so much we can do; too much that we want to do. Too much choice. And for me this just means so much more indecision. Blah. Freedom isnt all that its made out to be.
At least not without discipline and self-motivation. Both things which i lack. Just great.
One thing never lacking however is the ability to have fun. And anything that involves the friends i've known over the last almost 11 years, is definitely. Completely without a doubt, fun. So just a shout out to the life long friends i've made within those great years in AC primary/independent! Its the experiences we've shared that i cherish the most, and it makes me smile knowing that there's still much more to come.
or so it seems, at 1:20 AM
Friday, November 03, 2006
moral dilemma solved! yes!
moving on. have u ever felt like your'e living such an unfulfilled life.. that were the world to end right this moment, you'd spend the rest of eternity in regret? well i feel like that all the time. on one hand is the life you can see yourself living, the simplicity of it all. and on the other hand is reality, the cold hard truth that the dreams you have might never be attained. *breathes out* its gonna be a long 10 months before school starts again.. yet one more chapter is this boring life story of mine.
at least a numbing chapter is about to end! yes its 4 more days till i can look at my beloved pink ic again.. it symbolises everything i've gone through in the past 22 months. its what we've gone through all this for... to be a singaporean citizen. theres nothing much else to it really... either you serve and retain your citizenship, or zao and lose it. oh well. i guess it was worth it.
i know it was worth it, thats why i'm still here smiling today.
or so it seems, at 1:15 AM
